When I got into work today it was about half an hour before I decided to check my Gmail account. There, as I had hoped would be there many a time on every Wednesday and Saturday (day after Euromillions draw), was an e-mail from the National Lottery.
“We’ve got some news about your ticket from the draw on Tuesday 23 Sep 2014. Please sign in to your account as soon as you can for more information.
Congratulations and thank you for playing.”
I’d heard some stories before about people getting this e-mail and thinking they’d won the jackpot only to find they’d won a very small amount, I was prepared and assumed it was £10 or something.
Logging into my account I was still excited of course, it could be anything!
A message popped up straight away, it took me by surprise.
“You have just won £5.10 on Euromillions!”
To anyone else reading this it obviously says £5.10, but all I saw was 5.1 and million; I thought I was a millionaire.
I am sure less than 1 second passed before I realised it was just over £5 that I had won, but let me tell you about my experience in that time and the feeling I got which I never would anticipated that I would get.
For starters, this moment did not feel like less than a second, it felt more like 10 seconds. It doesn’t seem much but in comparison it is.
Instantly, I could feel and literally see (not kidding I could actually see it) an endless field of freshly cut grass in my line of vision. A completely level patch of grass which felt like a representation of a clearance of my financial rut and life decisions that I no longer really needed to worry about. Unexpectedly, I did not have a feeling of excitement, but a blissful feeling of emptiness, almost like I was being reborn. I felt like I had stepped back out of my body and was looking through my new life as a different person.
As hard as I am trying, I still don’t think I am truly explaining how this moment was and I don’t think I ever could. What is strange is that you would think that anyone who mistakenly thought they’d won the lottery would be very pissed off after finding out they hadn’t. It is quite the opposite. A part of that feeling of empty bliss has stayed with me and will be a reminder that any problems or worries aren’t really anything. For that moment everything went away and endless possibility remained, when in reality nothing had changed. The fact that I have this power to change how I feel without anything physical actually happening is amazing.